Mr Bojangels is one hell of a man….Panama Hat

Just when he thinks his dog is fine….

ugly dog2

His dog up n dies on him…

ugly dog1

But this old Hobo aint for turnin’ till he reaches the big rock candy mountains…

Lion, John Parker, Escape Route

The cops’ legs there are made of wood and the prisons are only tin…

Escape Route, John Parker, Humor

Little streams of alcohol leads me to my wee Suzies…

Ysmenia wedding dress

Take me down little Suzie…


Take me down some more baby….

Old bull chick 2 see you Jimmy

And some more…

Old Bull chick 1 see you jimmy

And some more… send me dead flowers when you’re done.. I’ll put a rose on your grave…

girl asleep in tree

They make me feel like a Hill-Billy…


Lord help me in my weakness as they carry me from the court-room to my hanging…

Can u le nd me a razor????

The jury are crying for more…



Take me Home with you tonight…


Och aye.. Am glad to be a Scot…

Y, M,A,I & me bar

And an Artist… and double Author… Me????

ZimbabweI‘ve crossed every bridge and asked nothing from no-one…

bridgeCan a man really love every woman he has slept with…

vestThis one can. Take me down little Suzie…

Me bar black hat bucaneroJohn Parker… Still out on the road…Skin like iron… and breathe like kerosene… That’s the way it goes.

I think we should take these scum out of jail and hang the fuck outta them….

Stuart ‘It’s a knockout’ Hall…Stuart-HallJimmy ‘Fixed it’ Saville…. (We can still dig him up and hang him),Jimmy-Saville-at-his-home-011Rolph ‘Can-ya-guess-what-it-is-yet?’ Harris…Rolf-Harris-arrives-at-Southwark-Crown-CourtAnd Gary ‘Wanna-be-in-my-gang?’ Glitter…Gary-GlitterHhat-ja say Clifford…cliffUh-huh-huh, it’s all in the catch-phrase….

Fucking string-em up.

Alex Salmond wonders how he ever grew up at all!!!

Freedom come, Freedom go!!! Campaign goes to ground!!!

Alex 1Never mind Alex… Want a tip for the 3.30 @ Ayr????

AlexYou can still bet on a horse using the Scottish pound!!

z pound noteyAnd you are still loved by one bug-fuck ugly mare…


Scotland’s biggest joke since Bonny Prince Charlie!!!!


Diary of John Parker. Today! Sunday! Sometime in July!! I wrote a song???

Title:- Sun-m-va-bitch.

Lyrics:- John M. Parker.

Music:- Albert Hammond/Warren Zeavon/Jimmie Rodgers.

(Music has been stolen, of course, and the artist John M. Parker will deny all knowledge)

The secret of an artist is to be able steal asunder the nose of a genius without him noticing!!!!


Verse 1.

Sauntering along giving public notice of a gait which boasts a no part lacking totally wrong attitude,

Displaying the vicious and profligate manner of a wreck-less, scholar pirate living the life of a Derring-do Dude.

Yo-de-leyee-a-alayee-a-ay-eee-oooo. (That was a yodel boys!!!)

Here the female singers enter for the chorus:-

Rosalita:-roseAnd Hing-a-mi-jig:-OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAThey sing the chorus of:-




(Just soo—-0000 me)

Verse 2.

Hell yeah Reverend, I am very acquainted with the seven deadly sins and it takes me all my time just to fit them all in,

But I’d like a job like yours, just making a business out of the goodness of life, and what there is to be got out of sin.


And the chorus girls:-

AS BEFORE, with a little bit more blues.

Verse 3.

Well Reverend, first and foremost, I’m in the entertainment business, and I find your candor unrefreshed.

In fact, smells like a good gust of shit has just blown over it, so about time we burned our shoe-soles and left.


And the chorus girls:-

We going up a bar now, and faster…still blues.

Verse 4. (Up a bar more)


For years and years I’ve rambled,

I drank my wine and I gambled.

One day I thought I’d settle down.

I met a perfect lady,

She said she’d be my baby,

We built a cottage in the old home town.


But somehow I can’t forget my good old rambling days.

The railroad train is calling me always,

I may be rough, I may be wild, I may be tough and county filed,

But I can’t give up my good old rough and rowdy ways.

Chorus girls:-

On same higher and faster key. (Hay-monn)

Verse 5.

I spent my life among among rough men ruled by their passions and addictions, a totally reprehensible bunch of goons,

And like them, I vary between, tipsy drunk, walking drunk, and dead drunk, depending on the time of day or state of the moons.




Diary of John Parker 23rd July 2014. Glasgow.

A famous day has passed…. It seems we are to be lead by a wee green man….GREENSHITEYes indeed, today was the opening of the 2014 Glasgow Commonwealth games at Celtic Park.

Not everyone was happy with the wee green shite!!!!

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERABut at least we did invite our prettiest Scottish Virgins to open the show….

Karen….KarenAnd Susan….SUSANTis no wonder they are virgins… I wouldn’t touch them with the prick of a donkey….

The aliens wouldn’t touch them either

Even if they were the last two females left in the cosmos.

Alas, it got worse for them….

So-ooo disappointed they were for being left with John Barrowman…. Who’s arse has been taken and given by more pricks in it than the surface of Mars has had dents in it resulting from asteroids.

I was impressed by the Taliban Toyota People Carrier with the set of antlers ad-hocked to it.

Good Scottish tackyness and saved a few bob too!!!!

Rod the Bod was a fucking Star as usual….

rOD SILVERI must ask him where he gets those tinfoil suits!

And to stop impersonating Mick Jagger’s dance routines?

Lastly, I felt sorry for the Queen, as The Duke of Edinburgh’s behaviour was uncalled for….


His chants of “Tongs ya Bass” and “Fuck the Pope” were not in tow with proceedings…

But it was his first time at Parkhead, in fairness after all.

I thought the Queen’s humming to herself of…

Tum-Tum…  Tum-Tum… Ta.. Tum-Tum-Tum at the end was magnificent!

qUEENI heard The Duke say to Our Beth…”Not quite old Ibrox Darling Lisbet?”

“No!” she replied, “It’s much more fun!!!!”


Gentlemen… Time please. My ode to all….

Desperate men follow desperate women down to the harbour…

She has an ebony face, which is without communication.

For all of her sixteen years she has been so forlorn,

Yet she still smells sweet as meadow.

But knows her love will not be replaced,

when she gives all over to the desperate soldier.

Desperately she clutches upon his long golden locks,

praying for the day there be a changing of the guards

and they may be the King and Queen of swords.

The soldier holds her to his chest,

Wants to light up her lonely world,

His bank-roll is stashed in her breast,

Round two coffee cups a future does unfold.

Promises…. Promises…. Promises.

She cries,,,

She sighs… with her head looking downward,

She cries….

Life aint that easy!!!

But reality calls upon her to venture onward…

Sad and lone, and without her soldier…..

She can’t spend,quanah under red light of danger.